Carlos Mencia's show

我已經試著打出聽得出來的部分，少部分實再是聽不出來
希望有人能補完, 以下是我聽出來的部分，聽不懂的我就……帶過
有錯誤也請修正, 實在是蠻好笑的這段……

white pepole if you don't remember how to be americans, that's ok
see, that's why people like me were here so you can ..........
just like me, be the guy of seccurity airports
i'll fix that shit, .........................
anybody that's not a hrrr just go airplanes
no metal detector, what~ you got a knife, take it
if ..... gets crazy, stab that motherfucker that's right
and you gonna put the pictures of highjackers on the plane over here
right there, pictures of all highjackers
and everybody that's a hrrheee just, hold, you go over there sir
why are you only checking people that look like me?
............. question, look at the pictures
holy shit, ......, hrrhrr over there and pull your pants down
we gonna do a ....... search
everybody else over there, oh~~fag, wrong line
fags over there, fags over there
i'm a terrorist, you gonna have to search me
i'm crazy lalalalalalalalalalaaa
there's a bomb in my ass, you can find it tick tack, tick tack
oh come on fags, that's enough
if you can take a bitch, you can take a joke