When I am a freshman, Happened the feeling I have never had before, I want to record it now,
but I am shy to write it by Traditional Chinese directly. So I try to write it by easy English
words(like junior high school level, full of Chinese style grammar).
When I complete military service, took the entrance exam and enter the college(night school).
In second semester, I got a part time job in the one of school offices. I am so lucky, there
are already a girl student working part time in the same office. She is a daytime student, senior
than me, a junior. Before she takes over the job, we are working together about three hours every
working day. We are working together so happy and talking to each other a lot of things. She is a
nice girl ,working hard, study hard, andso cute. But I have no confidence all the time to ask her
: Do you have boyfriend?
Through a half year, something happened in the school, to cause me need to make a choice, stay in
the same office or change to another work. This is the difficult for me to choice in between.
Finally, I choice another part time job.
But I must back to the school office for some administration questions to the stuff who I used to
work with. One day, I go to the school office. At the moment, I watched girl and another boy who
worked in the office next door(also a part time student), they sit on the same small chair. I
understand what happened. That boy is chasing the girl initiatively. In that moment, I am jealous.
This is a special feeling(jealous) for me that never happened before. I think I miss the chance.
This is the first time of my life to feel jealously happening on myself. I am like a home boy
(Otaku, 宅男). Before I enter the college, I live in myself world. Japan comics, Japan TV series,
Hollywood movies, novel, all love story and situation, all are just a fantasy for me. I am
surprised this situation really happened in myself at first time. This is a deep experience for me.
I think, love is free in the college, the girl make the choice, I have no right to interfere, just
to bless her silently. I am so lucky, girl trust me, so I got very private internet messenger ID,
blog and email from her.
Because we are all have not graduate yet, so we still maybe encounter in the campus, I saw girl and
her boyfriend being so close together, the jealous full of my heart.
Few months later, I read girl's blog, girl considered boyfriend not loyal to her, that boy already
have another girlfriend, I read girl's blog, I have a slight sorrow too.
That boy was chase the girl initiatively, why he has a foot in two camp(OR to keep a foot in both
camps? )? like a playboy. Pass through two years ,they separated.
Then I found I am to run short of words(OR nothing more to say? 詞窮), I don't know how to comfort
her, I don't know how to help her to cover a failure in love.
One day, on the IM, I pluck up my courage, ask her: Would you like to be my young sister? because
I am a only child in my family. (I served military service before went to college and took the
entrance exam twice, so I am older than girl.). This is my first time of my life to ask girl
something like this, after a little, girl reply me: We still be a friend. I understand what her
mean. I got a first GOODMAN CARD in my life.
One midday, a free english talking course hold on school language center, foreign english teacher
set a topic: The gift you best like in your life? I think more and more ,than I say: My best like
gift was a experience, when I am a freshman, I got a part time job in the school office, working
with a girl who is senior than me, through a half year, this experience like a gift from heaven,
a beautiful memory, I remember forever.
Girl is really trust me, don't delete my address, I am so lucky. I am a junior now, and girl was
finish school, working outside, maybe we can't contact frequently.
Girl let me feel a lot of feeling that never touched before I am twenty-five years old. I can
jealous(原來我也會吃醋), and I can love a common girl in the real world. Girl opens my heart, and
pull me to the real world.
I want to say: 我要謝謝這幾年發生的一切, 所有苦辣酸甜, 都放在記憶裡面.( lyrics by MC HotDog )
Finally, I need to say: 謝謝妳 桃樂絲 學姐 P(^_^)P

Ian's note 2007.01

附註1：
一直在想"自爆文"的英文該如何表達，曾想過bomb myself, self-bomb等字眼，後來詢問了學校的英文老師，
老師建議使用"the article of self-exposure"這個表達法。

附註2：
妳願意當我的乾妹妹嗎？ Would you like to be my young sister? 這句話的中翻英，是從事幼教英語的堂
哥提供的點子，謝謝堂哥。

附註3：
OTAKU, home boy, 宅男, GoodMan CARD 參考連結

http://www.taipeitimes.com/News/fea...5/05/2003306310

http://michael.orzcorp.com/2006_05_01_archive.html

附註4：
迷之音：這是我這輩子第二篇英文作文，第一篇英文作文是高中時寫的，內容是The history of F.U.C.K
原稿遺失了，超可惜的∼

附註5：
This article is my really feeling. Not joking.另外，我找不到英文的"學姐"，所以只好一直寫"girl"。